A Poop Story

Jeremy will celebrate his 40th birthday this year. With this impending milestone, he was feeling the urge to have a complete physical. So, as dutiful wife, I scheduled physicals for both of us. I was due for one anyway and figured we could knock this out in one fell swoop.

A week prior to our physical we fasted before our trip to the lab for blood work. It is absolutely hilarious how much more hungry you feel when you know you CAN'T eat. I feel petty even admitting this now due to current events and the actual suffering that people endure but, I figured I would confess. After our blood was drawn, we met in the lobby and headed to the elevator. As we were walking to the elevator, I glanced down at a small package in Jeremy's hand and asked him what it was.

Jer: Didn't you get one of these?

Me: No. What is it?

{we enter the elevator with two women}

Jer: I don't know, I guess they want my poop.

Me: Jer! Shhh {laughing}

At this point I was opening the package and inspecting the directions when the little vial that you collect your sample thingy (un-used of course) falls to the ground. Jeremy, clearly on a roll at this point, says sarcastically and jokingly:

'Pick that up!' He is obviously pretending to be bossy and totally kidding around and I am seriously laughing so hard, all I can manage is another 'Jer!'

We arrive at parking level and as we exit, one woman leads the way going in our direction. When we hit the parking lot, she turns to us and says, 'You guys look familiar. Don't I know you from somewhere?'

I shoot a quick glance to Jeremy who is a slight shade of red then turn back to her and in my ultra-sunshiney voice say 'Hi, I'm Sunshine.' I totally know how she knows us but, I am hoping to duck out of this one. She introduces herself and adds, 'Oh, I go to your church!'

Me: Oh awesome! This is my husband Jeremy. Remind me of your name again. (because I have totally forgotten it in this short amount of time due to my total embarrassment)

Her: (name) It is so nice to meet you. I'll see you Sunday.

Me: Great! See you Sunday.

I turn to Jeremy and we both just look at each other and quick step it to our car giggling. We are going to blame that on on low blood sugar.

A Simple Thought

I am an internet junkie. Often, I think I am over-informed. I am sure many would agree. We have up to the minute news on pretty much anything we would like information on. And, if anything random crosses your mind...there is always Google.

Obviously, there is no need to Google the disaster in Japan. It is all over the news and in the forefront of many of our minds. Headlines read somewhat like: 'Magnitude 8.9 Earthquake in Japan' , 'Death Toll Rises, Thousands Still Missing', 'Tsunami Swallows up City', 'Survivors Hold out Hope', 'Bodies Wash Ashore', 'Nuclear Reactors Melting Down.' So, so, so saddening.

I would not ever attempt to minimize the travesty or the grief or the overwhelming helpless feeling of sadness. My thoughts and prayers are honestly there...albiet a bit detached and somehow not totally connecting sometimes. I see the images of people weeping, homes lost and bodies being carried away and I cannot really imagine the totality of the situation.

And, I hear: 'Oh, you just wait...California is next.' Or, see flooding in other parts of our country. In the news I see buses overturning on US soil while people run amok and kill each other.

So, here is my simple thought; I looked at Jeremy tonight and honestly said this: All of this chaos would normally scare me. But, I know it is inevitable. This world is dying. If the radiation comes here or an earthquake happens...one thing I know: my God has prepared a place for me. There are many rooms. If it were not so, he would have told us. Therefore, take comfort in knowing....there is more than what we see. And, God WILL bring beauty from ashes.

A Random Recollection

It's been four months since I last blogged. Not saying this is a big return. Chances are, I will space it, or over-think it or forget it all over again. And, I really have no BIG idea for this post. Just a checking-in of sorts.

In the past 4 months:

1) Became a mother of a high-schooler: Absolutely freaks me out since I so clearly still remember BEING in high school. But, I refuse to parent out of fear and so we are chugging right along. Hiccups of course.

2) Officially have 2 teens: Another freakish but, fun event. Being 21 with my first kid, far away from my mommy with a partially paralyzed face feels like a lifetime ago. It definitely makes for some good memories.

3) Decorated a tree, in shifts, with just my daughter: VERY bittersweet but, not nearly as sad as it sounds. We still retained the 'oh remember this ornament?' fun after Grace and I did the hard work.

4) I look UP to my son: maybe for a little while longer than the past 4 months but, I have to stand on my tip-toes to see eye to eye. The oddity of this hits me at strange times. Like when he is sick and I am dragging him in to see the doctor. I am 5 steps ahead with a "man" following me complaining of his pain but, insisting we 'really shouldn't be here' & 'can we go home?' & 'can we get some food on the way home?'

5) Celebrated my 18th New Years with Jeremy: Our kids kept us up in the air about their plans so, we ended up by ourselves with no real plans around 9:00. So, an impromptu night at home...Wii bowling, music and dancing. Yes, we danced. By ourselves. In our living room. Same time, same place next year...right babe?

6) Marked our 9 year anniversary as a church: (January 6, 2002) This is humbling, amazing and merciful, There are not many words for it. It is all God. And for that, I am truly thankful.

7) Enjoyed a couple family trips: Grace competed in Vegas for San Marcos Pop Warner cheer. Her last year :( The team rocked & my girl has some killer kicks. Also, we managed to get away to Mammoth. So fun, so EASY and so bittersweet. Fun because it's MAMMOTH. Easy because they have this down after 11 years of boarding for Noah and 9 for the goose. Bittersweet because they ride without us!

Are we there yet? Ahhh...not so much. Life just keeps rolling along...by God's grace.

A Reason to Call Home

My son went to homecoming Saturday night. As we were scrambling rather last minute for something to wear the morning of the dance, it became apparent that I may have to iron. This may sound like simple event but, I have VERY limited ironing experience. My mother paid my grandma to do our family ironing. With 4 kids in private school, her being a nurse and my dad in uniform walking mail, this was a wise use of her money. My dad was probably the most pressed and professional looking mailman in South Sioux City, Nebraska.

Needless to say, the prospect of ironing was a bit of a dilemma so I did what every 21st century woman would do and I lamented on Facebook. The response was great. I had friends offer to iron the shirt for me, a link to a how-to website and a couple step by step instructions. As I laughed about my inability to iron, I decided it would be a good time to call my grandma. Sadly, I don't talk to her nearly enough and after speaking with her recently on her birthday, I made a mental note to call her more often.

Here is a roughly edited version of the phone call:

Grandma: Hello?

Me: Hi grandma, it's Sunshine.

G: Sunner? Oh hello!

M: Hi grandma. I was just thinking about you today and I thought I would call you.

G: Well Sunner, you know your old grandma here thinks about you all the time.

M: Haha. Thanks grandma. Guess what? I have to iron a shirt for Noah today and I don't know how to iron and it's all your fault!

G: (laughs) Ha! Well, you know I always did love to do your ironing. That Barb (my mom) doesn't let me do it anymore.

M: Yeah, well I should have taken a little time to learn because now I'm stuck.

G: Well, I'll teach you next time you are home. You know, that Conrad (her husband) was military and everything had to be pressed right with the 3points on the back. (She then went into a very elaborate description of the military press)

M: Wow! Sounds difficult.

G: No, no. I'll teach ya. Next time you come home. When are you coming home?

M: Soon grandma. I promise. You know, I was teasing Ashley the other day about noodles. (homemade chicken noodles are my grandma's signature dish) I told Ash that she got mom's noodles on her birthday but, when I come home, I'll get YOUR noodles. Right?

G: Oh Sunner, I will always make noodles for you!

M: Haha. Yeah, I told Ash it was because I'm your favorite.

G: Oh yes, you and Shane (oldest boy grandchild) Well, all you kids are special to me but, you and Shane lived with me so, you were different. It was just different, you know.

And without even prompting she went into the story of the day my mom and I moved out. My mom was a single mom when I was born and we lived with my grandma for about 4 years.

G: Oh you know, that day was hard for me. I was mad at Barb. And, when she came to get your bed, I just cried you know. And when I was vacuuming the carpet where your bed was, I just cried and cried.

M: Awww grandma, and I was just moving across town!

G: I know, I know. I just liked having you living with me, that's all.

M: Your too sweet grandma.

G: Well, I sure do miss you. I miss all my grandkids.

M: Miss you too grandma. I'll be home soon. I promise.

G: Ok Sunner. You take care. I'll teach you how to iron when you get home.

M: Ok. And, can I get a German Chocolate cake too.

G: (laugh) Oh, you know you can get a cake too.

M: Love you grandma.

G: Love you too sweetheart.

And, this just makes me think that I need to find more reasons to call home.

A Morning Run

My husband and I have been going on morning runs together. Although I am thankful for our healthy like-mindedness, I sometimes wonder why I didn't politely decline when he invited me the first time. The way Jeremy and I approach a run is SO totally different. As I trailed him again this morning, I realized that our running styles parallel our life together.

I could run for miles on a flat, even road at a steady pace. Jeremy likes hills and rough terrain. No warm-up. Just hit the pavement and go as fast as you can as quickly as you can. I am usually listening to Jack Johnson Radio while he is yelling back to me over whatever is thumping in his headphones.

In our relationship, family life and church Jeremy is the visionary and the do-er. He has absolutely no reservations taking an ultra-last minute trip somewhere. He is famous for tracking a snowstorm and giving us one hour to be packed and in the car. Since I am more of the planner I would like a little more notice than that. But, I have adapted and can usually see the fire in his eyes or measure his speech and know that there is a possible trip underfoot.

There is an illustration that we commonly use on our church staff about Jeremy and I. He is the ship and I am the rudder. Without the ship we would go nowhere. Without the rudder the ship would be unstable and the passengers may fall off.

My friend teased and called me 'stable Mabel'. She's right, I am way too content just keeping things steady. So, as I literally ate my husbands dust this morning, I had to thank God for his pushing me and keeping us moving ever forward. Relationships are no easy task and it is truly a gift when you find the strengths and weaknesses in your spouse and you help to glorify them rather than fight them.

P.S. I still fantasize about running in circles around the lake at a comfortable pace.

An Interesting Summer

Wow! It has been quite an interesting summer. This calendar season and this season of my life has been quite challenging. I have attempted to write one big blog post upon my return after a wordless summer but, have failed on 3 attempts. So, I am going to settle on short and sweet.

I say wordless summer because that really is what it felt like. Nothing was making much sense for a couple of months as a lot of life got turned upside down. And, you know what it is like when things are upside down. You still look at things from your former right side up perspective which just causes a bit more confusion and frustration.

So, here I am taking a deep breath on the other side of a phase of life and looking back. Isn't it always so interesting how things can be so irritating and miserable when you are amidst them but, when you get through it you look back and think 'gee, I am really glad I went through that,'?
Well, maybe that statement is made with clenched teeth and a bit reluctantly and with a different word other than the chipper 'gee'. But, you probably get my point.

Needless to say, life is always full of lessons and I got quite a "schooling" recently so, it is time to get writing. Feel free to follow my blog, comment or e-mail me anytime...
sunshine@themovement.org

I will be posting again soon!

Another Mouse in the House

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 14, 2009

This was the original story last year...they are back

I had a sneaking suspicion there was a mouse in my house. My dogs had been fairly skittish off and on and my daughter had spotted one peeking out from below our deck out back. My fears were confirmed when I found some mouse poop behind the trash can under the sink. Yuck.

I promptly headed to the store for some mousetraps. I purchased some fancy traps that were advertised as "Black Cats". Safe and effective. Safe for whom? And, if my neighbor's cat had been effective in the first place I wouldn't be in this pickle. I was a bit skeptical, so along with the Black Cats, I purchased 2 good old fashioned wooden traps. The kind that make you tense just trying to set them and make you wince as you gently lay them on the ground.

I placed one fancy "Black Cat" trap outside, one behind the trash and the back-up, cheese loaded, old school trap beside it and felt prepared. With the traps in place, I turned down the lights last night and headed to my room to watch a little television.

Less than 20 minutes later, my dogs began going nuts out in the kitchen. I sent Jeremy out to investigate and he quickly summoned me to the kitchen. "I think you caught your mouse." It is funny how he attached ownership of this mouse to me. It is probably because I was so bent on catching it and was taking the invasion very personal. I am totally fine with mice living OUTSIDE where they belong. But, once you invade my home, just know that I will win. However, I had no idea how far off my eventual victory was.

Standing in the kitchen, it was clear that the mouse was caught but, not dead. Squeaks and the clanking sound of the metal from the wooden trap was an early indicator that this mouse was up for a fight. So, I let it fight for a few minutes thinking it would surely end quick. Well, I was wrong. And, with my adrenaline through the roof at this point and the ick factor in full force, Jeremy and I realized we needed to take action.

So, Jeremy headed out to the garage and retrieved a broom and a box. His plan: sweep the mouse into the box and let it die outside and out of earshot. He then hands ME the broom and gives me the go ahead. And, like most normal women I batted and swatted and swept that mouse into the box while myself squealing and hopping and freaking out. It was classic late night drama at its best.

With the mouse in the box and hopefully on the brink of death, we headed out to the trash bin. But, after putting it in the trash and hearing it's flopping around suddenly amplified by the enclosed space; Jeremy decides that it is not only annoying it is also unsafe. After all, this is a super mouse and everyone knows a mouse can flatten itself to the size of a quarter or something like that. So, he takes the boxed mouse out of the trash and out front to die in the driveway. End of story? End of mouse?

As I head to spin at 5:30 am this morning, I peek in the box and the mouse is still. Since I am in a hurry I decide to just throw it away when I get back. Well, I came home with 2 coffees in my hands and a list of things to do before I take the kids to school and head to work so, I assign Jeremy the disposal of the mouse duty. He says he will get to it in a minute. (lots of football re-caps to go over, I am sure)

As I leave for work at 8:20, I hear the mouse flopping around in the box. You have got to be joking me! Incredulous, I run back in the house and tell Jeremy to drown it before I get back home. When I come home an hour later, I peek in the box and yes, the mouse is still there but, now it is not moving. So, even though he hadn't drown it yet, I felt relieved that is was finally dead.

Thirty minutes ago, I stepped outside to let my dogs run around and finally dispose of the vermin. And, believe it or not it was still alive! I just cannot tell you how much I am freaking out at this point. On one hand, I feel kinda bad for the poor thing. On the other hand, what is a girl to do? So, I take the drowning of the mouse into my own hands.

I fill the bucket and turning my head, I dump the mouse into the water and without looking put the box on top. Chewie (my dog) and I stand there for a few moments and I am trying to calm down. Dumping a mouse into a bucket is a bit overwhelming. As we are standing there, Chewie's ears perk up and I seriously hear this mouse start to cry. (well, it was technically squeaking but, at this point I am about to cry so we might as well cry together) At this point I am fairly confident that I am being punked by this mouse.

I carefully lift the box off the bucket and shockingly this doggone, super mouse is using the trap as a flotation device! Oh my Lord! I am thinking this can't last long so, I put the box back on top of the bucket and honestly pray it ends quick.

Wouldn't you know that I not only trapped the sturdiest mouse in the world but, it is also an excellent doggie paddler. It would do a few barrel rolls on the trap and land right side up every time. Stressed out and needing a little help, I called my mom to tell her of the darma. After laughing, she suggested the rock which now sits on the head of the mouse in the bottom of the bucket. Alas, I won.

But, I am not really happy about it. In fact, I do feel kind of bad. But, the reality of the situation is that mice don't belong in the house and in my house we play by the rules. As an addendum for all of you fellow animal lover/PETA people out there, I am sure there were other options. But, at this point I don't really care. If you had a mouse in your house you would probably do the same.